Witnessing the Self By Adorning - Day 1
The intention I had articulated for my Practice as Mastery in my Capstone proposal is as follows -
In my practice of witnessing through the disguise, it is by residing in awareness and attention that I want to observe myself deeply in order to understand what the mask, elevates, conceals or reveals.
My own practice of disguise will sustain the inherent visceral nature of performative traditions by imbuing meaning into objects and relying minimally on word or text. As a part of my practice, by wearing masks I will inhabit new Self’s which I have not experienced before and wear traits mightier, fiercer and more comical than my real face. I intend to experience what it is like to temporarily become a different person visibly. The identification of a person is the face. And so, to alter, enhance or hide facial traits with a mask is to be stripped of the identity I have built for myself over these years."
Based on these intentions as a part of my practice, I decided to inhabit my masks every day for 30 minutes in a day to observe the Self and my own interaction with the experience. Here is a short video of the highlights of my practice.
After this experience was complete I analysed my state of being in the following format -
At the end of Day 1, I was still concealing. My fear and vulnerabilities got the better of me. I was still operating from the space of disguise and hiding. I did not adorn my mask, I did not reveal. However, I did experience a few points of abandon which were extremely short-lived. I did not experience the state of 'Becoming' that I wanted to experience.
Many small yet significant realizations struck me today such as - For meaning and transfer to emerge there has to be an interaction with the audience. Till such time the process of adorning is an act of preparing the mind and witnessing how I am challenged by both. The act of adornment is lonely, fraught with questions and doubts, but it is also a space to prepare the mind.
I intend to keep at this activity and keep plotting my state of being as I go along.
My own practice of disguise will sustain the inherent visceral nature of performative traditions by imbuing meaning into objects and relying minimally on word or text. As a part of my practice, by wearing masks I will inhabit new Self’s which I have not experienced before and wear traits mightier, fiercer and more comical than my real face. I intend to experience what it is like to temporarily become a different person visibly. The identification of a person is the face. And so, to alter, enhance or hide facial traits with a mask is to be stripped of the identity I have built for myself over these years."
Based on these intentions as a part of my practice, I decided to inhabit my masks every day for 30 minutes in a day to observe the Self and my own interaction with the experience. Here is a short video of the highlights of my practice.
After this experience was complete I analysed my state of being in the following format -
At the end of Day 1, I was still concealing. My fear and vulnerabilities got the better of me. I was still operating from the space of disguise and hiding. I did not adorn my mask, I did not reveal. However, I did experience a few points of abandon which were extremely short-lived. I did not experience the state of 'Becoming' that I wanted to experience.
Many small yet significant realizations struck me today such as - For meaning and transfer to emerge there has to be an interaction with the audience. Till such time the process of adorning is an act of preparing the mind and witnessing how I am challenged by both. The act of adornment is lonely, fraught with questions and doubts, but it is also a space to prepare the mind.
I intend to keep at this activity and keep plotting my state of being as I go along.
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